Unsure

Thinking back on my past 20 or so days of not eating take out, I have mixed feelings.

There have been a few days that I've wanted nothing more than a hot meal that I didn't have to prepare myself.

I've been craving bagels every morning. I totally should have bought a pack and toasted them myself...but in my morning haze it always seems like too much work.

This morning I had free bagels at work. Surprisingly less satisfying than I had hoped they would be. Old stale and unfortunate...though my bagel craving is at last squelched.

I had hoped for a significant change in my life by not getting take out. I think there has been. In my stubbornness I find myself at the grocery store every couple of days. I feel like I'm cheating, buying pasta roni, Campbell's soup, and basic bread and cheese. I'm not really cooking, like I'd hoped though I am definitely saving quite a few dollars.

I guess I'm beginning to doubt the daily benefits of this challenge. When I'm run down and exhausted, eating a few carbs and some cheese doesn't quite cut it. As my vegetable intake wanes....I feel more and more unhealthy. The pounds I lost when I first started have begun to creep back, and I'm feeling as wasteful and out of touch with reality as normal.

I feel like in most challenges there is a plateau, or a wall that you just have to push through. Once you're past the rush of trying something new and different, you are back to just what you have every day, life. Life seems to so often get in the way. I plan to push through. If I make it, I will be proud of my accomplishment. A little silly I know, but to keep with something through think and thin?...I think is an accomplishment for us all....